365 Ways To Wellbeing – 320th Way
Nowadays many couples get divorced when their children are still small. I used to wonder it a lot. Not anymore. Even thought it’s still sad, I do have to admit that nowadays I understand why it can happen.
The years with small children are SO HARD in so many different ways! Parents with grown-up children often remind younger parents how fast children grow up. That heavy years will not last forever. True, but when you´re actually living those heavy years, months, days and hours with a constant sleep debt and everything, they feel very long! It´s true that years with small children give a lot, but I have to say that they also take a lot! That’s especially the case with your relationship and your marriage…
Heavy years with small children are years that are very vulnerable for different kind of confrontations between the spouses. In other words, a couple who was used to be on the same side by supporting, encouraging and loving each other, may drift away from each other. Possibilities for confrontations are many; the amount of so called my time, amount of housework, number of wake ups at nights because of the children, amount of money brought to the family, etc. Situations that may sound rather easy to handle, but in reality are not. Not when you have to deal with them stressed and tired without any kind of idea when might be the next time that you’re able to sleep properly.
Sounds depressing? Yes, it is depressing. Hopeless? No. No, if you decide to do something about it. The life that parents of small children are living is no doubt challenging, but by no means hopeless. Not if you want to stay together and are ready to work for your relationship. If you’re willing to find ways to solve the challenging situations and to stay on the same side – to work as a team.
Me and my husband aren´t any different from others. Especially the last year has been very heavy for us. I´ve read my six rules to decrease the amount of confrontations many times. This day we talked about our year, its challenges and our relationship with my husband. Challenges aren´t over, but so far we´ve managed to solve our confrontations and stay on the same side. And along the way learnt already so much new about ourselves and each other. That was definitely a worth of BIG smile this day!
Read more about my “Wellbeing Challenge 2013 – 365 Ways To Wellbeing”.